Michael Jackson, "Thriller"

Mitch unleashes the hounds of hell

Mitch’s Pitch:

There are only two kinds of people in the world: those who love Michael Jackson and those who lie about not loving Michael Jackson.

When the Thriller singles started hitting in late 1982 I was decidedly in the second camp - a staunch rock fan that absolutely rejected pop music on mere principle. By the time the Thriller singles finally stopped coming in 1984 I was unabashedly in the first camp - an open-minded music fan who no longer cared about genres or coolness. 

That’s what Michael did for me. He destroyed my musical prejudices. 

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About 350 yards and 350 years from where I presently sit, 19 people, mostly young women, were hanged to the death for practicing witchcraft. Of course, they weren’t actually witches (not that there’s anything wrong with that), but they were definitely the innocent victims of a mass hysteria intentionally caused by cynical politicians and their unscrupulous allies, who sought to solidify their own power, and force their values upon the rest of Salem’s population by othering people, creating fear, stoking violence and causing chaos.

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

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In the late ‘70s rock fans were pitted against disco fans. Lines were drawn. Records were burned. Rock music was seen as “real” music that could change the world, while disco was meaningless party music for coke heads at Studio 54. Of course, rock music was also made by white men, while disco was made by “other” people - predominantly people of the black, female and gay persuasion.

I didn’t see that at the time, but it’s obvious now.

***

The music of Thriller, created by Michael, producer Quincy Jones, the guys from Toto, and a cast of thousands, is transcendent - an amalgamation of instruments, songs and style that combine to form a truly innovative R&B and rock hybrid. 

The songs are unforgettable (okay, “Baby Be Mine” and “The Lady in My Life” are harmlessly forgettable - not every album is Year of the Cat). We get the delightfully smooth treacle of “The Girl is Mine”. There’s the Off The Wall style banger of “Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin”. We get a gorgeous ballad in “Human Nature” (shout-out to John Mayer’s legendary tribute version). We get the hit that launched a million lead-footed moonwalk imitations in “Billie Jean”. And my favorite song on the album, the irresistible “P.Y.T.”, which could make a dead man come...dancing.

Then there’s “Beat It” - the song that single-handedly ended the rock vs. disco battle forever, with Eddie Van Halen’s iconic and incendiary guitar solo giving rock kids permission to get on board with the new King of Pop.

And what more can be said about the song “Thriller”? Featuring Vincent Price, fresh off his starring turn in The Brady Bunch, “Thriller” was a song, a dance, quite literally the greatest music video ever made, and has rightfully become a Halloween classic.

Thriller might just be the greatest album ever made.

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A funny thing has happened to Salem since the Witch Trials. Learning from its past, the “Witch City” is now a mecca for wiccan culture, and is one of the most diverse and inclusive places in the world - regardless of how you look, what you believe in, or whom you love. 

Maybe, just maybe, we can change if we really want to.

***

Halloween is one of the last things that unites us as a culture. A time when we open our doors to strangers and create community. Where everyone happily wears a mask and political teams don’t matter in the least. When we all agree that full-size candy bars are the best and Necco wafers are the worst. 

Thriller reminds us of a time when America was brought together by love, rather than hate. It unified us. It delighted us. It defined our culture and redefined music. It shattered prejudices and opened minds. And it goes without saying that it is a true musical masterpiece, clearly deserving of a top-shelf spot in the Newbury St. Collection.

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Ken’s Response:

Frank Sinatra, Elvis Presley, The Beatles, and Michael Jackson.  The world got turned on its head exactly 4 times during the 20th century regarding music.  That’s not to say there weren’t other amazing stars and moments, but those four artists each brought the musical world to a complete halt!  Frank (who calls the shots for all those guys) had the Bobby-Soxers (and the world on a string), Elvis had throngs of teenage girls swooning over him, The Fab Four had the Beatlemaniacs, and Michael had everyone!  As Mitch said, you either loved Michael or you lied about not-loving Michael.

For me, I started off in November 1982 as a Michael hater.  But by the time you could actually find multiple copies of Thriller in the record store, and the popularity of the singles was waning so that they were only played once an hour on every radio station in America, it was mid-1984.  At that point, I was already becoming obsessed with the next North American phenom that would become as big a legend as they make…Alex Trebek.  

So in honor of one of the greatest, most monumental albums of all-time, This…Is…Jeopardy!

Coattails for $400:

“While it seems unbelievable now, at the time Producer Quincy Jones felt like this Jackson solo project needed more star power so he enlisted the help of this Liverpool musician?”

Who is Paul McCartney?

Records for $800:

“Thriller set a record with a whopping 7 Top 10 singles including “Thriller”, “Beat It”, PYT (Pretty Young Thing), “Billy Jean”, “The Girl Is Mine”, “Human Nature” and this song which started the dance craze called The Moonwalk.

What is “Billy Jean”?

Commercials for $1000:

“These two child actors, who remain famous today starred in a Pepsi commercial with Michael Jackson during the height of Thriller’s popularity”

Who are Alfonso Ribiero and Corey Feldman?

• Pitch successful (he’s BAD!)

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CJ’s Response:

Let’s get something straight right off the bat. Thriller is a first-ballot Hall of Fame album. It is the Mariano Rivera of recorded music. Quite simply, it is the most perfect pop record ever made. To argue differently is folly and would strip all credibility from any serious music writer who tried to do so.

I loved Thriller when it came out and I was, and am, a card-carrying metal head (yes, our cards are made of actual metal). We had two copies of the album in my house when I was growing up because there were many times when one of us was listening to the album and somebody else wanted to listen to it in their own space and on their own terms. All of us—me, my brother and both my parents—knew every word to every song and would have heated discussions over which one was best.

So, why am I struggling and equivocating and vacillating on this decision?

Because Michael Jackson was most likely a pedophile.

Now, before I open this bag of crap, allow me to say all the things that need to be said.

1. I am knowingly violating the rules of our newsletter. We pledged to separate the music from the artist when judging each album. So, even if our little community sides with me on this argument it should in no way reflect poorly on Mitch or Ken who are two of the best people I have ever known. This is me stepping out of line, not them.

2. I am a hypocrite. Vince Neil’s drunken stupidity led to the death of another human being and I pitched a Mötley Crüe album without hesitation. Didn’t even mention it in my pitch.

3. I am setting a precedent which could threaten to undermine the candidacy of every single album we pitch from now on.

There are horrible people who do horrible things all over this world. But when they involve children, I cannot forgive or forget. Therefore, I will not allow someone who hurt a child into a Collection with which I am associated. Even if it is an imaginary one.

So yeah, I’m the guy who didn’t vote for Derek Jeter.

Under these circumstances, I can live with that.

• Pitch Failed (The music didn’t fail us. The man did.)

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Mitch’s pitch was not successful and Michael Jackson’s Thriller has been exiled back to Neverland.

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It’s time for you to look at the man in the mirror and consider how MJ and Thriller makes you feel. A dangerous issue like this isn’t black or white, so stop by the comments section and say, say, say what you mean.

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Please join us next week as Ken goes back to Luckenbach, Texas with Willie, Waylon and the boys, as he pitches the outlaw country supergroup The Highwaymen and their 1985 debut album, Highwayman.

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The Exile on Newbury St. Spotify playlist features our favorite songs from all the albums we’ve discussed to date. Subscribe today and listen back on the fun we’ve had so far.

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Exile on Newbury St. is a weekly newsletter competition between some old friends to see who has the best taste in music. Learn more about us and the rules of the game.